The Unanimated Misadventures of Pearl and Connie
by Nick Foolery
Summary: When Connie is hanging out with Steven, and Pearl comes up, acting totally different than normal, what's gonna happen? Rated T for cursing, although I'm sure you'd realize that if you're here about Rick and Morty


**WUSSUP FUCKERS? It's me, Nick Write, here with an idea that's been floating around my head for a few days now. I was watching some Steven Universe and Rick and Morty stuff, and was thinking, " You know ' Pearl and Connie' has the same amount of syllables of Rick and Morty." Huhthus this idea was born. Y o U ' E**

Connie sat on Steven's couch, waiting for the young boy to finish using the bathroom, that way the two of them could finish their game of Oligopoly. While she was waiting, she saw the temple door open, and a white gem stumble out of her room. Connie immediately recognized her as Pearl.

" Oh, hello Ms. Pearl!"

The white gem looked over, her face showing fatigue, and a bit of confusion. Then, she grinned.

" C-c-c-connie, hey, t-t-t-there's the girl I'm loo-urrrp-ooking for."

Connie stared at Pearl in confusion." Uh, are you okay ma'am?"

Pearl ran over to connie, and grabbed her by her shoulders.

" There's no time for that now Connie! I-i-i-i need your help with something! Som-urrrp-ething important."

Connie was beginning to get nervous." Uh, what is it?"

Pearl burped for the third time. Pearl had never acted this way before, what was wrong with her?

" I-i-i-i seem to have switched personalities, Connie. There was this weird machine that Peridot built, and I got in it when she was testing it. B-bu-uuurp-t that's not the problem. The problem, Connie, is that the machine is completely broken."

Connie got worried." Ah jeez, Ms. Pearl. How'd that happen."

Pearl took a swig from a random flask she pulled from her gem." I beat the shit out of it after it changed my personality, Connie. Now I need your help to fix it."

Connie eyed the flask nervously." Why do you need me, why not Peridot? Isn't she the builder."

Pearl stared at Connie, eye's wide." C-c-cause Peridot's a little shit Connie. I don't want her stupid to infect my brain, don't you understand Connie? Y-y-y-uuuuuurrrrrrp-ou're way smarter than her."

Connie smiled nervously." I don't know about that Ms. Pearl. Uh, what do you need?"

Pearl grabbed Connie by the arm, and went over to the warp pad.

" We need parts, Connie! We need some part from the Kindergarten, w-w-w-w-w-what else would we need to fix the ma-urp-chine?"

Connie sighed." I-i-i dunno Pearl. Ah jeez look you got me stuttering now. I don't know if i'm the best person to bring with you."

Pearl knelt down beside the human." You're my partner Connie! Now come on, we got parts to get!"

So they warped away. As soon as they did, Steven emerged from the bathroom.

" Huh? Where'd Connie go?"

Meanwhile, in the Kindergarten...

" C-c-come on Connie! Really put your back into it!"

Connie struggled to pick the injector up, to get to its valuable parts.

" Y-y-y-y-you know it'd be a lot easier if you helped me, Pearl."

Pearl took another swig from the flask." W-w-w-whatever Connie, you know I'm-urp-I'm supervising you so you don't hurt yourself."

Suddenly, they heard growling from behind them. Both of them turned around, seeing a couple of fusion experiments wandering towards them.

" L-l-l-l-look at that. That's some fucked up shit right there, Connie. Homeworld wondered why I shattered Pink Diamond, when they do shit like this."

Connie looked over, even more confused." Steven told me his mom shattered her."

Pearl waved the girl off." That's besides -uurp- the point. J-j-just get your sword out, and kill those chronumburgh monstrosities."

Connie pulled out her sword, and fought off the gem mutants, while Pearl was sitting on the rock, and drinking. Once she was done, she was covered in scratches and dirt, with a very annoyed look on her face.

" Y-y-y-you know Pearl, you could've helped me."

Pearl didn't budge." No can do Connie, I didn't fight a thousand year war to save this planet, to protect this planet. Now geuuuuurpt those parts."

Connie stood her ground." W-w-w-what if I don't want to, Pearl? W-w-what if i want to go home and play Oligopoly with Steven?"

Pearl got into Connie's face." Y-y-you're a fucking idiot Connie! We need these parts so we can-urrp-can get back to normal."

Connie had had enough." How about you get your own parts? There isn't even anything wrong with me. I-i-i hate your new personality, Pearl!"

Pearl sighed." Look, Connie. Let's get these p-uurp-arts and get me changed back."

So they got the parts, and went back to the barn, where Peridot fixed the destroyed the machine.

Pearl looked over to the green gem." Peridot, there's something i wanted to tell you before i get changed back."

Peridot turned around, a hopeful expression on her face." Yes?"

Pearl took one last swig of the flask." You're a fucking dumbass."

Peridot sighed, and flipped the switch. The machine roared to life, and Pearl began to glow a bright light, blinding everyone, before fading away, leaving Pearl face down in the dirt. Connie looked to her tutor.

" Did it work?"

Peridot looked down." Only one way to find out."

Peridot went down to Pearl." I love you."

Pearl jumped up." I'm sorry but i don't like you like that!"

Peridot held her hands up." It was just a joke."

Pearl sighed." Oh, okay."

Peridot sighed.' noitsnooooot'

Connie grinned, and walked by Pearl as they walked away from the barn.

" I'm just glad that was sorted out."

Pearl nodded." Why do I feel all weird?"

Connie grinned sheepishly." It's a pretty long story..."

MEANWHILE, SOMEWHERE ELSE...

"M-m-m-m-morty! What the hell happend to my office? Where's all my liquor, and why is everything all organized and clean. And what the hell is this porn site for ' large, pink haired, women?'"

A young boy with orange hair was just as confused as the man in front of him.

" I-I-i-i dunno Rick, you just started obsesively organizing things, and then started to cry about some pink woman."

Rick nodded." It seems I switched personalities with someone. Hyper dimensionally! Come on Morty, we gotta find the Rick that did this!"

Morty sighed." Here we go again..."

 **aaaaaaaaaaaand that's a wrap! To be honest, I had way too much fun with this, and i may even continue it later. maybe. but seriously, I hoped all of you liked it, if you did, feel free to follow, favorite, and review, and as always...**

 **See You On The Flip-Side~Nick Write**


End file.
